I’M NOT SURE WHEN IT HAPPENED, when I became a corporate muse to my boss, a Mother Hen to my peers, and the type of employee who is resigned to wasting time by covertly taking notes about my co-worker’s annoying habits should I need to present my charges at a human resources hearing, or a discovery session with a boardroom of lawyers. Although, I suppose it happened as these things often do, slowly and over a period of time.

There was a time when I was up-and-coming—a promise to management, an upstart, a young lion. The calendar reminds me that that was more than 20 years ago. When I cared not only cared about an office career, I wanted a successful one.

But as it sometimes happens to folks who make a career of being in the wrong jobs, but somehow are consistently rewarded for it, I lost my ladder-climbing mojo.

Still, I could not make a successful jump to a full-time writing career— not as a journalist, or a copywriter, or a novelist—so, when I fell into the deep crevice of boredom that technical writing. Hardly a writing career, but it seemed to lend some legitimacy to my badly wanted need to BE A WRITER, so I kept at it. For a decade. Until one day when I was updating my resume, trying to find a believable balance between fact and fiction, that I noticed an alarming number of positions I held were better, or more accurately described as “corporate muse” than by the title claimed on my resume.

I was not the hardworking, productive employee I pretended to be

I have a professional history of repeating my mistakes. And by this, I mean several times I’ve worked for the same company, but at different times. Let’s be clear. I’ve quit and been re-hired. I learned early that I could negotiate a higher wage when an employer knew my work. Somehow, I’d convinced myself that I was a hardworking, productive (and thus, valuable) employee. When in truth, it was more a case of “the devil you know.”

It wasn’t long before I realized that I had a rehiring quality that some folks recognized, but it was years before I figured out how to turn it into a career. I was working to making this awkward way of earning a living into a line of business and into a title on a business card.

Eight rehires at six different companies before I started to question the real reason I was rehired. They said it was, in part, because I was “fun.”

While fun folks are, well fun, at parties and in social situations, I was digging for a deeper truth. My rehires confounded me because my disdain for office work could be obvious at times that it could be palpable. What other reason would they keep me around?

Could it be that I was being hired as a corporate muse? What a terrific (and impressive!) thought.

What, exactly, does a corporate muse do?

You might be wondering what exactly a corporate muse does. Since I created the job label, I figured I might as well create a job description to go with it.

In a role like this, you are expected to be part court jester, part career counsellor, part spiritual advisor, and part sage, and a little bit of a jerk. It helps if you are willing to be the foil to features your boss would like to show off to impress others (his humour, her smarts, their keen business sense).

Not everyone reacts with enthusiasm

Being hired to be a personal confidante and to entertain the boss does not gain any favours with his or her other direct reports. If you choose this line of work, or rather, if this line of work choose you, expect to feel ostracized by your colleagues because you will always be on the outside. No worries. It can be a fun place to be. There’s not need to get involved in office politics, just sit back, watch the drama unfold and Tweet about it.

You will be privy to conversations others will never hear, you’ll have the inside track, and you will have this all without seemingly having paid your dues. And this will piss off your colleagues. As they struggle in the trenches you cut in line. But, unlike an administrative assistant you don’t seem to have a real job, yet you still have his ear. This is what angers them. You’re monthly invoices are also cutting in the department’s payroll budget, perhaps even into their annual wage increase, or semi-annual bonus package. Or so they think. A corporate muse always pretends to earn more than she actually does. Like actors. And temp workers.

Your experience, knowledge, and qualifications will be questioned by those who see you only as the teacher’s pet, but you are given an awesome opportunity to force the personal growth of managers and executives. It’s pretty cool.

This is a terrific opportunity to use one-on-one consultation human interaction to candidly comment about the folks you work with and about the manager’s shortcomings (this is the funnest part of the job). If you know when to push and when to step back, you’ll prove your worth and management will keep you around, paying you to tell them what they already know, but in a more entertaining way.

Don’t expect the hiring person to fully understand why he or she hired you

To break into the business of corporate musing, you’ll need portable skills. A background in sales, or administration is helpful. Creativity and adaptability are also prized because they will support the boss’ need to justify your hourly rate.

Although, it seems kind of new-agey, this pseudo position will leave you with the time, energy, and finances to pursue whatever line of work you are really interested in. No fairy dust, crystals, or Feng Shui required.